Online Dating in your 50s - does it still work?

The 50s age bracket is a strange one - you’ve seen a bit of the circus called life, performed the antics, and in the process have developed something of that elusive thing called wisdom. You are beginning to comprehend things with a different perspective and your views on love might have changed too, though your need for love and companionship remains as strong as in any other age, perhaps stronger than it has ever been. For some life takes a relaxed pace - children are somewhat grown up and need less micromanaging; some are even empty nesters! Work’s on a roll by now - most people have found their calling in terms of profession or adjusted with whatever life has thrown at them. With so much to talk about and share, we think this is the age that we feel the need of a companion the most. You’d notice that some quarrelsome spouses start accepting each other when in their fifties! 

So does dating in your 50s work? Well, yes it obviously does. As far as the dating scenario goes, 50s are the new 30s. A whole lot of people in their 50s and even above are looking out for love anew. Check out the speed dating sites all over Europe and you’ll see what I mean. With so many dating apps out there, people above 50s can comfortably single out dates before meeting them face to face.

Dating essentially remains the same for every age, but what your expectations are from it is what defines it for each individual. When in your 50s, you’ve already had a shot (or multiple) at love, and you are “experienced” at handling the curveballs that come with a relationship.Some people expect more of a physical intimacy while some are looking more for companionship. Some are even looking to settle down in a marriage.The kind of age group you are seeking also speaks a lot about your dating expectations. The biggest hurdle I can think of is starting to use the internet dating apps, and trying to get a hang of those. Once you master that - there’s no stopping you.

If you think online dating is for Gen Z, online dating is hard, there isn't much to offer in online dating apps to offer to people above 50 - all your assumptions are wrong. 

Think of online dating apps as Facebook for dating. Does it sound hard now? No. Now let’s assume you are sending friend requests on Facebook to random people.  Will you determine a specific category or just trash-fill your friendlist? - You’d choose as per your criteria, right? Same with dating apps! You have to know your criteria (think age, ethnicity preference, common interests, etc), know what you are looking for (casual, serious, platonic), and use the app judiciously for the first few days or so.

So is online dating for people over 50s hard? Yes, and No.

Online dating over 50s is not actually hard. Finding love at any age needs a bit of wooing, a bit of luck, and a few swipes!

When determining an app for dating, you would need to choose the right one. There’s an app for every kind of match. You into platonic stuff? There’s a dating app focusing on the platonic side of love. You looking for a casual, flirty affairs, there are online dating apps for it. You serious about finding “the one”? There are online dating apps for that too. Like we suggested above - list out your preferences and check from our dating list below what dating apps are perfect for your criteria. Follow this methodology, and you’ll find online dating almost a cakewalk for ages up until 70+!

That said, there are definitely some common causes that have aired the view that online dating above 50s is hard. Some of them are :

• You're looking for a chick who is really young, like just out of high school. Dating young women might be thrilling, but maybe look for someone in their late 20s - early 40s if you are 50+.

• If you’re not a Richard Gere or a George Cloony, don’t expect an Emma Watson or Kiera Knightly. You might very well get someone who looks like a beautiful land mermaid, but the chances are significantly lower, unless, ofcourse, you’re very rich.

• Your dating profile. Fill that honestly. Pour out your heart - what you like, dislike. You’ll attract the right kind of person. A half-filled, staple-sounding bio will only leave you swiped out.

• Being desperate to find love is also a BIG turnoff. Women like to be pursued, not stalked or harassed. Know your limits, take cues, and move on to fresh faces.

There are at least a dozen really good online dating sites that have really good ratings and reviews. These sites cater to different niches and tastes, and are popular around the world. They have millions of active profiles to choose from. You might have only heard about Tinder so far, but the market is quite saturated with other popular online dating apps.

It’s best to have your profile in 2 or more dating sites if you're still unsure about your preferences and want to check the ‘biodiversity’ of these apps. Let’s say you are interested in dating a specific ethnicity like a Latina or a Southeast Asian, but you are also particular that your date should be academically inclined. You might need to move over Tinder and start using Harmony for that.

If you're looking for the best dating sites for the generation 50+, check out our ranking:

A separation may be liberating, but it comes with emotional baggage. People end only unhappy things - if it was happily ever after, it would have continued. And then there are abusive marriages, partnerships that end due to infidelity. There’s a child support and self-support angle that needs to be taken care of. In all of this, will you find love?

The first thing to let go along with the relationship is any bitterness and prejudice. The next person in your life can be a completely different individual than the one you put up with. Remember, healing is necessary and has to be a continuous process after a separation,  even after you find someone new. Unless you heal from your pain, you carry forward the remnants of the last relationship that didn’t end well. How to heal? You’ll find suggestions and good advice online. You can find the Ho'oponopono technique, meditation, regular exercising or reading to be therapeutic.

This is a question that bothers many. When this question arises, it is not so much a matter of “what’s right for me”, but more of “how family and society would judge me”.

There’s no one socially acceptable, globally accepted wait-period. What feels right for you, and for people directly involved, especially children, is the right wait-period. It can be one week, one month or you might just spot someone while coming out of the court! Who can determine when cupid strikes!

You can just start with baby steps by registering on some dating apps. You can be cautious, but don’t be too distrustful. There are bad relationships and good relationships. We bet you’ve seen some very good ones that restore your faith in love again and again.

Dating after losing a partner can be more strenuous than dating after divorce. You're dealing with pain, loneliness, flashbacks of times spent together. There’s a mental strain, and dating seems like the last thing to embark upon.

Most endings signal a new beginning, and life doesn’t have to stop after your partner’s decease. Online dating apps are safe, have people who are in similar positions in life, or have lost their partner, and want to start giving love another chance. Look at Sheryl Sandberg! Draw some inspiration from how she moved beyond pain to living a happy life with the partner of her dreams.

Here again, there’s no specific wait period to follow. Some people suggest a year, but we recommend you to decide the timeline of the events in your life.

Dating women in their 50s can be fun and fulfilling. She has had her shot at life and relationships, might have been married and raised kids, might be widowed or divorced. She is experienced at life. And wants to live it further to the fullest. Wooing a lady above 50s is like being on an adventurous ride. Also, dating women above 50s is more for people who can see beyond the skin. ‘Cause truth be told, not every 50+ would be a Salma Hayek or Halle Berry, but they sure would have a charm and grace that comes only with age. You can also expect a more matured way of looking at life from women in their 50s. They also tend to have lesser expectations,and many of them are financially stable - they are not after your will.

If your niche is younger, more energetic women for ahem! you know what - then we wish you luck in finding the woman of your expectations. You’ll find plenty, don't worry.

A lot of younger women are looking for older men who are experienced in expressing and making love, are financially stable and can support them. While not every young woman is after your money, some are definitely considering an older partner just for the sake of being financially taken care of.

Some young women find older men attractive in terms of looks too. They may fall for the grunge and the grey, for the way you manage your kids, for your slightly outward pushing belly (yes, women like it too, just like men); the reasons range from cute to weird to bizarre. In short, the dating market for men above 50 is green.

However, if you are not looking for hookups, it might be good to do a self analysis on whether you want to date a significantly younger person. They come with their sets of childlikeness, which can sometimes gross down to childishness. They can expect to be treated like wingless angels or princesses without a crown, and may want a lot of your productive time or restful time (think movie dates on weekends, when all you want to do is rest at home). Ask yourself if you are willing to be thus bothered for a really long time.

If you do, and you want to live your 20s with another 20-something, it’s best to pay some attention to your physique and persona. She’ll be introducing you to her young friends, and you don’t want to come across as this douchebag. Physically fit mature men are coveted by younger women.

Conclusion

Dating over 50s has long ceased to be a taboo. Your child might have even suggested  it to you. We humans don’t really live too long, and living alone on top of that can be stifling for a lot of us. If you still haven’t tried any dating app, give these dating apps we have listed a shot.  Start that 2nd or 3rd or 4th innings! Live life and have fun!